“its not who you are on the inside that matters, its what you do that defines you” – said to Bruce Wayne in the movie Batman Begins.
In today’s culture we often find identity and value based on what we do. “We are what we do.” I don’t think this is the case. We are exactly who we are on the inside, it’s just a bit hard to know what that is because we cannot see it, we can only see the evidences of it in actions. This may just sound like semantics but it is an important distinction to make in order to find satisfaction and contentment. I understand that we may think that on the inside we are kind, generous, a good driver… when on the outside our actions do not show it and there is a truth to be found in the actions. Our actions are very good indicators of who we really are. They teach others and even ourselves who we really are on the inside but the actions themselves do not define us.
What does define us? Character, those internal values that direct your motivations and actions. Who I am will determine how I do what I do. Let me explain. It is no more spiritual to be a missionary than it is unspiritual to be a plumber. I can be a prideful missionary or a resentful plumber. The telltale of a person is not what they do but how they do it. A generous person is generous in all things and at all times. Who you are is revealed in everything you do and in every response. I can do many good things while still being a person of weak character. This is being like the Pharisees. They thought they were good because they defined themselves by what they did. My goal is to be a man of great character throughout whatever God puts in my path whether humble like Brother Lawrence, or great like Paul.
My identity is found in who I am on the inside yet we focus so much on accomplishments. God calls us to give to the poor yes, but only as the overflowing of a heart of love, compassion, gratefulness… When I read the words of Jesus I realize that the ‘Law of Grace’ requires obedience to not only the letter of the law (actions) but the spirit of the law (character). We must dig deeper and get beyond the actions to the truth of our own character.
In order to train my heart in the invisible aspects of being rather than in the visible aspects of doing, I have an interesting practice of asking “who do I want to be on the inside?” and thinking about the man I hope to be at the end of my days. I think about who he is rather than what he has done and ask the question, “how would a person of that character respond in this circumstance?” not how would they respond in action but how would they respond in heart, because that will dictate the action as well as the motivation behind the action which is character and lasting and important.
Action alone is meaningless unless it comes from a good and obedient heart. An obedient heart is what God has called us to, not to achieve results because God can get results with or without us. He wants to form the inside, my real identity, to be who he wants.
-Eric
Monday, December 11, 2006
Monday, December 04, 2006
Rest...
I have always been amazed at the greatness and sovereignty of God. He has been a very real and present help during the last couple months of crazy schedules. In the Bible study I am leading with the interns here we are reading through the whole Bible in 7 weeks. The consistant theme I have been seeing is the extent of God's love and sovereignty. He accomplishes all things with purpose and reason with the end always being so "they will know that I am the LORD". That they will understand the extent of his love, mercy...
Obedience becomes easier when I maintain a view of the shortness of this life, the sovereignty of God, and his enduring love for me and my family. This mindset brings me great peace and rest because I know that I cannot ruin God's plans. During this Christmas season the birth of Christ takes on a fresh meaning as I futher explore and understand this pivotal moment in God's design for time and how it reveals and fulfills what God has been trying to say to his people all along.
-Eric
Obedience becomes easier when I maintain a view of the shortness of this life, the sovereignty of God, and his enduring love for me and my family. This mindset brings me great peace and rest because I know that I cannot ruin God's plans. During this Christmas season the birth of Christ takes on a fresh meaning as I futher explore and understand this pivotal moment in God's design for time and how it reveals and fulfills what God has been trying to say to his people all along.
-Eric
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
Stiff-necked...
This morning I woke up with a very stiff and sore neck. I had to wake up early to dig footings for the new church in Tabacal with a team from Kids Alive. They had not told me the team was coming until last week and I was not looking forward to working again with Kids Alive and now my neck hurt too. I have been thinking a lot about my distaste for Kids Alive and how to “love your enemies”Lk6:27-36. I have also been reading the Pentateuch where Israel grumbles or chooses to obey certain parts of the Law and not others. For these of God’s people who continue to do wrong in spite of their knowledge of right he calls them “stubborn” or “stiff-necked”. Almost immediately I saw the connection. My neck was a constant reminder throughout the day of my need to choose to obey all God requires and love the people of Kids Alive.
The people on the team focused on Doug (missionary with Kids Alive) for their questions about the design. This thoroughly frustrated me because the church in Tabacal has nothing to do with Kids Alive, It was MY project, but it was a personal pride issue in my heart. The truth of the matter was that he was a great help there and of course the people from the team brought their questions to him, they had been working with him all week and were used to asking him.
Following Christ requires my whole attention and commitment to all that he requires of me every day. I must take up my cross or I am not worthy to be his disciple. Lk9:23, 14:25-27
-Eric
The people on the team focused on Doug (missionary with Kids Alive) for their questions about the design. This thoroughly frustrated me because the church in Tabacal has nothing to do with Kids Alive, It was MY project, but it was a personal pride issue in my heart. The truth of the matter was that he was a great help there and of course the people from the team brought their questions to him, they had been working with him all week and were used to asking him.
Following Christ requires my whole attention and commitment to all that he requires of me every day. I must take up my cross or I am not worthy to be his disciple. Lk9:23, 14:25-27
-Eric
Thursday, October 19, 2006
Waters of Suffering...
At 3:50 I was told of a 4:00 meeting with my pastor in San Lucas. I rushed up there to find no one there and the pastor not answering his phone. I called the other attendee who told me the meeting was at 5:30 at another location. I arrived there and the meeting still did not start until about 6:30 and finished a little after 7pm. This is how Guatemala normally works but my only fear was that I now had to ride my morotcycle home in the dark, in the rain, on a road under construction. On my ride home I was genuinely scared (similarly to a previous ride home in the dark and rain) and I asked the Lord for help. No sooner than the words had left my mouth that I drove through a pot-hole which splashed me with cold water. A few moments later a truck splashed me and then a car next to me splashed me. I prayed out loud again frustrated with the Lord saying, “Lord… I need your HELP! Are you going to or not.” I was reminded of Luke 14:26 which says, “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father, mother…even his own life, he cannot be my disciple.” My mind was brought to my willingness to suffer while God asked me why I had gone up to San Lucas, waited and endured the meeting knowing this would probably be my fate. My answer was, “for you.” Then who are you suffering for? God! It hit me that I was given the privilege to suffer for God. Imagine if the scripture in Luke 14 said instead, “If anyone comes to me and is not willing to be splashed with water…cannot be my disciple.” Splashed with water! Tell me you wouldn’t laugh. Of course I am willing to be splashed with water…there are much worse things to suffer for His name and if I can suffer for Him just by being splashed with water, bring it on! Right at that moment the rain stopped and I was not splashed again the rest of my trip and to be honest when I arrived at home I was a little disappointed that there was no more rain or splashing that I could “endure” for Christ.
Many times I serve God expecting God to help me in return but when bad things happen right after my service my tendency is to complain to God “thanks for nothing” rather than rejoice in being able to suffer for God and accept it as a gift because trials produce…mature and complete Ja1:1,4 and because suffering produces…character and character, hope… Rom5:3-5 They are the road to my goal.
-Eric
Many times I serve God expecting God to help me in return but when bad things happen right after my service my tendency is to complain to God “thanks for nothing” rather than rejoice in being able to suffer for God and accept it as a gift because trials produce…mature and complete Ja1:1,4 and because suffering produces…character and character, hope… Rom5:3-5 They are the road to my goal.
-Eric
Friday, October 06, 2006
When the littlest is the biggest…
These past 2 ½ weeks Heather has been back in the states visiting her dieing grandfather with three of the kids. Anzo and I have been home alone. During this difficult time for our family many people wished us well. Many people said they would be praying for us. Many people said many nice things to me during this time yet few did anything about it. During the 16 days, two people came over to visit. The fact that only two made time to check in on me struck me but not nearly as much as the positive impact that the visit of the two people did have on me. The people who invited me to stay for dinner, those who just asked about the situation and then remembered to ask followup questions later, those who prayed with me on the spot. I remember that there were not many but most importantly I remember how significant they were to making me feel supported and important. Had I had a serious need, I would have asked one of the few who had displayed, in action, they cared.
In reflecting on this experience I am confronted with the truth that most of the time it is the small things that mean the most and end up being the biggest. The small things like a hand written thank you note, a call for no reason other than to listen to how anothers life is progressing, “pick-me-up” flowers, visits or invites, it is these small expressions of care that are most often overlooked. Often I pass the opportunities thinking, “they really are nothing significant…I can pass it by” when in reality the truth is that most people do pass them by with the same thoughts and only the purposefully caring actually carry through with these kinds of actions. I think that if people understood better the impact of these small gestures they would be more likely to do them.
It is the great love that is behind the small actions that is felt. Even if there is great love, without the actions it remains unreceived and misunderstood. When people just said, “we’re praying for you…” (when I knew they probably weren’t) or other niceties, I understood this as wishing us well and being polite but really not wanting to be inconvenienced by anothers difficulties not sharing or bearing one anothers burdens. But it was those who took interest and ownership with actions that helped me with the load.
When there is someone who is hurting and I want to do something for them but I don’t know what, I can do one of these small actions for them rather than just wish them well. Small actions reveal that I am willing to help with bigger things if they should come. I must take the time to carry through with the “small” things that come to mind because when it comes to a person feeling valued, usually the littlest things are the biggest.
-Eric
In reflecting on this experience I am confronted with the truth that most of the time it is the small things that mean the most and end up being the biggest. The small things like a hand written thank you note, a call for no reason other than to listen to how anothers life is progressing, “pick-me-up” flowers, visits or invites, it is these small expressions of care that are most often overlooked. Often I pass the opportunities thinking, “they really are nothing significant…I can pass it by” when in reality the truth is that most people do pass them by with the same thoughts and only the purposefully caring actually carry through with these kinds of actions. I think that if people understood better the impact of these small gestures they would be more likely to do them.
It is the great love that is behind the small actions that is felt. Even if there is great love, without the actions it remains unreceived and misunderstood. When people just said, “we’re praying for you…” (when I knew they probably weren’t) or other niceties, I understood this as wishing us well and being polite but really not wanting to be inconvenienced by anothers difficulties not sharing or bearing one anothers burdens. But it was those who took interest and ownership with actions that helped me with the load.
When there is someone who is hurting and I want to do something for them but I don’t know what, I can do one of these small actions for them rather than just wish them well. Small actions reveal that I am willing to help with bigger things if they should come. I must take the time to carry through with the “small” things that come to mind because when it comes to a person feeling valued, usually the littlest things are the biggest.
-Eric
Sunday, September 10, 2006
The question of contentment?
The other night a fellow missionary asked me how I deal with the issue of contentment. He had noticed that most of the missionaries have a very negative outlook on the country, ministry, people… He told me that we seemed to be content in our situation and was curious how that was.
I think missionaries are no different than anyone else. They have the same hang ups, the same problems as you would see in the states. Many people are so driven by how they think ministry should be done, so blinded by how they think God has “told” them to minister that they become unwilling or resentfully flexible, a new sort of individualized legalism. It is such an easy trap that leads to discontentment which opens the door to other in country irritations. It is easy to move from, “they run this ministry in such an ungodly way” to “this country is so backwards in its thinking they should do it this way…” Negative attitudes toward people move toward a habit of negative attitudes towards more people. This hits a little closer to home for me when I think of Kids Alive and the grievances I have with that ministry. I cannot let hurts of the past turn into a path of negativity toward my circumstances.
I believe the best I can hope for is that in every situation I choose that which in my heart of hearts I think is the right thing to do, the thing that lines up with scripture as best as I understand it. This is a choice for myself that I cannot hold all people to. I must make my decisions humbly. My choice may be wrong, I cannot always know absolute right but I can know what I think is the right thing even if at times it seems arbitrary. This is the key to contentment that I must look to every day. When I look back on decisions that seem to have gone awry, I can take comfort in the fact that when I made the decision I honestly thought I was choosing right. I may choose differently now but I need not regret my previous decisions. God give me, give all us the wisdom to see the right we should do, the character to choose it and the strength to endure in it.
-Eric
I think missionaries are no different than anyone else. They have the same hang ups, the same problems as you would see in the states. Many people are so driven by how they think ministry should be done, so blinded by how they think God has “told” them to minister that they become unwilling or resentfully flexible, a new sort of individualized legalism. It is such an easy trap that leads to discontentment which opens the door to other in country irritations. It is easy to move from, “they run this ministry in such an ungodly way” to “this country is so backwards in its thinking they should do it this way…” Negative attitudes toward people move toward a habit of negative attitudes towards more people. This hits a little closer to home for me when I think of Kids Alive and the grievances I have with that ministry. I cannot let hurts of the past turn into a path of negativity toward my circumstances.
I believe the best I can hope for is that in every situation I choose that which in my heart of hearts I think is the right thing to do, the thing that lines up with scripture as best as I understand it. This is a choice for myself that I cannot hold all people to. I must make my decisions humbly. My choice may be wrong, I cannot always know absolute right but I can know what I think is the right thing even if at times it seems arbitrary. This is the key to contentment that I must look to every day. When I look back on decisions that seem to have gone awry, I can take comfort in the fact that when I made the decision I honestly thought I was choosing right. I may choose differently now but I need not regret my previous decisions. God give me, give all us the wisdom to see the right we should do, the character to choose it and the strength to endure in it.
-Eric
The priority of the Gospel...
--Reflection on Acts--
I have been asking myself, “exactly how important is the task of actively sharing the gospel? What do my actions reveal about my belief in the importance of the gospel?” There is the obvious “Sunday school” answer as well as the acknowledgement that I should be more involved in sharing my faith but…I’ll get around to that later because “I’m not perfect”. I do believe that actions speak louder than words and that a life characterized by the love of Christ is more powerful than Bible thumping but as I examine the lives of the heroes of faith I rarely find a passive position that leaves the testimony of Christ at the level of loving character without the actions and words behind it that are purposeful in revealing more than just the love of God but more specifically the gift of Christ in the gospel message itself.
Paul was all consumed with sharing the gospel. He saw caring for widows as important work but only as secondary to the gospel. He was so consumed with this notion, so dedicated to its purposes that he did nothing outside of this scope of sharing the gospel. Is my life characterized by actions pointing to the gospel? Is my primary concern not just for the physical or emotional wellbeing of other people but there spiritual and eternal wellbeing which can only find healing in Christ? Do I believe it so completely that I am compelled to proclaim it in whatever manner or action I can? Do I love Christ enough to dedicate myself to the task he has given me? Do I love others enough to give myself to their needs and listen to them openly? Do I believe the gospel message enough to move beyond mere compassion for others to being an ambassador for Christ?
I often find myself so surrounded by good things that I must refocus myself on the things that matter most and dedicate myself to my specific calling from Christ which, as for all believers, includes the preeminence of the task of love that points to the gospel, a task that is for the benefit of all people whether already believing or not.
-Eric
I have been asking myself, “exactly how important is the task of actively sharing the gospel? What do my actions reveal about my belief in the importance of the gospel?” There is the obvious “Sunday school” answer as well as the acknowledgement that I should be more involved in sharing my faith but…I’ll get around to that later because “I’m not perfect”. I do believe that actions speak louder than words and that a life characterized by the love of Christ is more powerful than Bible thumping but as I examine the lives of the heroes of faith I rarely find a passive position that leaves the testimony of Christ at the level of loving character without the actions and words behind it that are purposeful in revealing more than just the love of God but more specifically the gift of Christ in the gospel message itself.
Paul was all consumed with sharing the gospel. He saw caring for widows as important work but only as secondary to the gospel. He was so consumed with this notion, so dedicated to its purposes that he did nothing outside of this scope of sharing the gospel. Is my life characterized by actions pointing to the gospel? Is my primary concern not just for the physical or emotional wellbeing of other people but there spiritual and eternal wellbeing which can only find healing in Christ? Do I believe it so completely that I am compelled to proclaim it in whatever manner or action I can? Do I love Christ enough to dedicate myself to the task he has given me? Do I love others enough to give myself to their needs and listen to them openly? Do I believe the gospel message enough to move beyond mere compassion for others to being an ambassador for Christ?
I often find myself so surrounded by good things that I must refocus myself on the things that matter most and dedicate myself to my specific calling from Christ which, as for all believers, includes the preeminence of the task of love that points to the gospel, a task that is for the benefit of all people whether already believing or not.
-Eric
Thursday, August 17, 2006
Stay the course...
Heather and I just finished Colosians in our devotions and the main theme that was coming out to me was, "Remember Christ and Stay the course". I must remember who Christ is and who I am in Christ. Jesus, many times in the gospels says, "you know the scriptures but you are missing the point!"
Many times I know the scriptures but I miss the point, the purpose or heart of the scripture. Be it because I am caught in Christian culture or don't fully believe it in my actions, I don't let it hang out there too far.
The other day I was imagining life after death and thinking back to life here and now. I remember thinking, "those struggles in life were so little a price to pay." Understanding my own unworthiness in light of the gift God had given compared to the suffering or sacrifice experienced in life. Regardless of how much I surrender or "lose" in service to God, at the end of the story I will not regret it a bit.
I must focus and stay the course. I cannot ride the fence in reserve, being able to cut my losses if I am in error. The question for now is simply, "do I believe it enough to let it hang out there a little bit farther today than yesterday"
-Eric
Many times I know the scriptures but I miss the point, the purpose or heart of the scripture. Be it because I am caught in Christian culture or don't fully believe it in my actions, I don't let it hang out there too far.
The other day I was imagining life after death and thinking back to life here and now. I remember thinking, "those struggles in life were so little a price to pay." Understanding my own unworthiness in light of the gift God had given compared to the suffering or sacrifice experienced in life. Regardless of how much I surrender or "lose" in service to God, at the end of the story I will not regret it a bit.
I must focus and stay the course. I cannot ride the fence in reserve, being able to cut my losses if I am in error. The question for now is simply, "do I believe it enough to let it hang out there a little bit farther today than yesterday"
-Eric
Saturday, August 12, 2006
Opening thought
This blog is a place for us to share our thoughts with others as well as a place for us to visit and remember. Our other blogs describe our comings and goings, events and work but here is a place to know us and see our thoughts. They will not always be profound, deep, or even serious but they will always be true to our hearts. I hope looking at our journey will bless you along yours.
-Eric
-Eric
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)