When the littlest is the biggest…

These past 2 ½ weeks Heather has been back in the states visiting her dieing grandfather with three of the kids. Anzo and I have been home alone. During this difficult time for our family many people wished us well. Many people said they would be praying for us. Many people said many nice things to me during this time yet few did anything about it. During the 16 days, two people came over to visit. The fact that only two made time to check in on me struck me but not nearly as much as the positive impact that the visit of the two people did have on me. The people who invited me to stay for dinner, those who just asked about the situation and then remembered to ask followup questions later, those who prayed with me on the spot. I remember that there were not many but most importantly I remember how significant they were to making me feel supported and important. Had I had a serious need, I would have asked one of the few who had displayed, in action, they cared.

In reflecting on this experience I am confronted with the truth that most of the time it is the small things that mean the most and end up being the biggest. The small things like a hand written thank you note, a call for no reason other than to listen to how anothers life is progressing, “pick-me-up” flowers, visits or invites, it is these small expressions of care that are most often overlooked. Often I pass the opportunities thinking, “they really are nothing significant…I can pass it by” when in reality the truth is that most people do pass them by with the same thoughts and only the purposefully caring actually carry through with these kinds of actions. I think that if people understood better the impact of these small gestures they would be more likely to do them.

It is the great love that is behind the small actions that is felt. Even if there is great love, without the actions it remains unreceived and misunderstood. When people just said, “we’re praying for you…” (when I knew they probably weren’t) or other niceties, I understood this as wishing us well and being polite but really not wanting to be inconvenienced by anothers difficulties not sharing or bearing one anothers burdens. But it was those who took interest and ownership with actions that helped me with the load.

When there is someone who is hurting and I want to do something for them but I don’t know what, I can do one of these small actions for them rather than just wish them well. Small actions reveal that I am willing to help with bigger things if they should come. I must take the time to carry through with the “small” things that come to mind because when it comes to a person feeling valued, usually the littlest things are the biggest.

-Eric